Wednesday, February 24, 2021

Tax Returns and Road Rage

For most of my adult life, I prepared my own taxes. But things got complicated after my husband died. A few years later, I was putting my kids through college, further complicating things. So I started using a CPA to prepare my return for me. One less thing I had to deal with. This went on for several years, and each year, the fee was a little higher than the year before. Meanwhile, my kids had flown the coop, and my financial life became much simpler. But it took me until this year to return to doing it myself. (It's so, so easy to become spoiled!)

I follow rules. I don't cheat. (Well, maybe I've broken a rule or two, like wearing white after Labor Day. And I admit to looking in the back of the crossword puzzle book for the answers on occasion.) I am terrified of getting into legal trouble. Someday I'll tell you about the time I got kicked off a plane. Or the time the DEA came knocking on my door. (I was innocent both times.) But I don't want the Tax Man coming after me for tax fraud. I forced myself to put my paranoia into my pocket and get on with the job.

I am very proud to tell you that, as of today, both my federal and state returns have been e-filed! Was it fun? No. Was it easy? Well, it wasn't as hard as I'd expected. Did I save some money? Yes, about $350.

And what the hell does road rage have to do with this? That's a different story:

Last Friday, I was all packed and ready to drive north to my significant other's place for the weekend. (We were both scheduled for our second vaccine!). Suddenly, it started to rain. Now, in Florida, a rainstorm can make roads dangerous in a nano-second, so I decided to wait until the shower had passed. I texted Ed at 1:10, informing him of this delay. By 1:30, the skies had cleared, and I was on my way. A 20-minute delay.

As I was driving north on I-95, I saw a couple of bulletins stating that I-95 was closed up ahead. But everyone else was still motoring on, so I did, too. Until the exit for Donald Ross Road, where we all had to creep along at 4 mph. I spent 45 minutes in this logjam, with no idea what was going on. And then there was a complicated exit from the highway and some decision-making on how to bypass whatever was holding things up in order to get back onto I-95. I successfully navigated the U-turns and ramps and continued on my way.

It wasn't until the next day when, while reading the paper, I came upon the reason for the hold-up. Road rage! According to the article, there had been a minor collision on the road. Both drivers pulled over to the shoulder. And then one of the men was shot! He died at the scene. There was a picture of him in today's paper, along with a request for witnesses to contact the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office with any information. The dead man was 29 years old, the same age as my son. Oddly enough, the other man was questioned but not arrested. Surely, there's a story to be discovered here.

Anyway, I did some rough math in my head and realized that, had rain not delayed my drive, I might have been one of those witnesses. Timing is everything, isn't it? Hell, I could have been the driver who got side-swiped! There but for fortune . . . 

So how do income taxes and road rage connect? It's simply this: I'm grateful that I am alive and here to do my tax returns. Amen.



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