State of Confusion

When Stephen Miller Donald Trump takes the stage tonight for the State of the Union address, will I tune in? Or will I wait for Stacy Abrams? Although I haven't decided yet, I suspect it will be like that train wreck thing. I don't want to miss what Jared Donald has to say. How many lies stories will he tell? Will there be live fact-checking? Will Stormy Melania be smiling in the audience? Will MacBeth's witches Kellyanne, Sarah, and Ivanka sit together? And what about Beavis and Butthead Eric and Don Junior? Will they bring their families? And who will keep Cruella Ann Coulter quiet? So many unknowns! I guess I will have to tune in, at least until I throw my last bottle of tolerance at the TV.

If you detected a lack of comity in that opening paragraph, you're very perceptive. "Comity" sounds just like "comedy," which is somewhat comedic, I think. A lack of courtesy and considerate behavior toward others has been a casualty of this administration, with bullying and name-calling the norm that the White House spits out on a daily basis. Will Drumpf Trump go off the rails tonight? Will he tear up the speech that Miller he painstakingly crafted while on executive time and speak from his ass gut, as he is prone to do?

It is tradition for the Vice President and the Speaker of the House to sit behind the President at the State of the Union address. But will Mike Sycophant Pence sit next to a woman who is not his wife? (I call her my hero Nancy.) Perhaps his homophobic wife Karen will wedge herself between Mike and Nancy, just to keep things chaste.

Although the Notorious RBG is doing well and back at work, it is my understanding that she will not be in attendance with the other Supremes tonight. And who can blame her? She has an excuse to watch the address on her home TV, where she will be free to yell "You lie!" as many times as she wants. On second thought, maybe she should just go to the gym and let her personal trainer distract her from the comity comedy tragedy that will be enacted in the House Chamber. I don't want RBG to get too agitated.

Yeah, I'll watch. If for no other reason than to see if the bleeder leader of the Free World does his sniffing thing. I used to think it was from snorting cocaine, but I've been told that it's from snorting Adderall. Apparently, he does this because he can't read, and he gets nervous when he has to read cue cards or a teleprompter. Who's prescribing the Adderall? Dr. Ronny Jackson maybe? My favorite "mis-read" was when the idiot Trump talked about hard-working parents who "sacrifice every day for the furniture . . . and future . . . of their children." Yep, he said that. The President of the United States.

With all the shit poop hitting the fan these days, I have to wonder about the furniture of this country. IKEA, do you hear me?